Lonely and Ignored...

For some reason, I felt quite down today, don't even know what caused this. I just remember something from yesterday in my mind that sounds like "If you don't like to talk to me, just tell me face to face, no need to look somewhere else when I talk, refuse to answer and refuse to tell me anything". Another thing is an individual didn't tell me anything after our last class yesterday and luckily I saw that individual on the way out and found out some "news", otherwise I would have been waiting somewhere like a total idiot....

Today, I felt no mood as soon as I woke up, don't know if it was caused by the stuffs yesterday or because I had not had a good night sleep or both. When I reached the university I just isolated myself as I really had no mood for anything. Throughout the whole time in university, the individual whom I presumed didn't like to talk to me, find me annoying and dislike me was happily talking to everybody else, I avoided contact a few times because of what I presumed.

Just as how it always was and what I can always expect, people who were sitting together with me discussing stuffs would just suddenly abandon me and walk away together without saying a thing to me. However, since I had nothing better to do since I was supposed to meet a counselor but the counselors have gone to a training course till Thursday, so I just quietly followed them. I did some homework in the library and watched the others doing their stuffs. I said something to an individual and that individual said something back which I couldn't hear, so I asked "What did you say?" and that individual just didn't bother and abandoned me like always. The 3 individuals were walking together when I took another path out of the library to our class which is much shorter and of course, I arrived at the class first.

After our last class of the day, I asked that individual again what I couldn't hear earlier. To my despair, that individual totally ignored me and walked away (again...). What else can I do, I just blazed through the crowded area till the parking lot.

Then, when I was driving back, some stupid car suddenly came out from a junction and appeared right in front of me. I was moving quite fast then, then what else can I do...of course brake hard. As I braked, the car was getting closer and closer and I was just inches away from ramming it, the screeching sound of the tires was so loud for about 3 seconds and I saw smokes gushing up behind my car, probably caused by the sand on the ground or the heat from the friction of the tires and the road. I was neither scared nor shocked by this incident.